Church should be a safe place for my wife, but it’s not

If you ask me why I care about church as a safe place, my answer is because of my wife. She is the abused that feels uncomfortable hugging a stranger because the priest/pastor told you to. She is the wounded with social anxiety that feels so panicked in your congregation.


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An orientation for single sexuality: The ‘do’s’ of purity

Braun Karla sm

OMG, so many amazingly good quotes in this article:

This isn’t to say I’ve stopped believing marriage marks an important boundary for healthy sexual activity. However, I find my parameters not through a checklist of don’ts, but by discovering who and what God calls us—as embodied souls—to be and do.

I’m convinced that the best thing the church can do to encourage holy living is to help us follow Jesus, not a spouse.

I don’t need rules about (not) having sex: I need the church to help me reject the lie that desire is the most important thing.

…I’m not waiting—for a spouse, for sex, for my own little nuclear family. I’m learning what it means to be a Christ follower, distinct from the patterns of the world, active in service, in relationships with others.

Read full article here (highly recommended):

Why have young people in Japan stopped having sex?

For their government, “celibacy syndrome” is part of a looming national catastrophe. Japan already has one of the world’s lowest birth rates. Its population of 126 million, which has been shrinking for the past decade, is projected to plunge a further one-third by 2060. Aoyama believes the country is experiencing “a flight from human intimacy” – and it’s partly the government’s fault.

Japanese man and woman lean away from each other

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‘Asexuality: An Overview’ By Julie Decker Explains A Frequently Misunderstood Identity [VIDEO]

‘Asexuality: An Overview’ By Julie Decker Explains A Frequently Misunderstood Identity


This in-depth analysis and first-hand perspective sought to “explore the history of the asexual movement, uncover current research on asexuality, debunk common misconceptions and discuss the challenges the asexual community faces.”

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How Elizabeth Smart Is Taking On Rape Culture

Smart has taken steps to expand upon the issues at the heart of her statement about purity culture. In an interview in the upcoming issue of the New Yorker, Smart explains that abstinence-only education is one piece of a bigger puzzle. She notes that’s just one of the multiple factors that contribute to a society in which rape victims are shamed instead of supported…


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…people in [sexual] boxes labeled, “Christian, moral” and “Non-Christian, immoral.”

selfish sex can occur within a marriage, too. Some people firmly believe they have the right to someone else’s body once they are married. Some pastors (ahem) even teach that. I would rather that two unmarried people have sex that honors one another’s autonomy than that two married people treat each other’s bodies with disrespect.


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But throughout his book, he dehumanizes women, voyeuristically using them as sermon illustrations, making assumptions about their lives, and even, at one point, implying that women who have/want sex outside of marriage are “cheap” and “easy.” (Full context: “She [the woman in Song of Songs] is fully in control of herself and she is not cheap and she is not easy.”)


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